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How to Avoid Going Down on Her

17 Mar 2014
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The British Association
Cold sores, going down on his woman, have a stuffy nose, having her doggy-style, you're so impatient, you’re so impatient
“Act as if you don't know how to go down on her”

“Act as if you don’t know how to go down on her”

Not every guy loves going down on his woman – in fact, the majority of us can’t stand it at all. Unfortunately, this very act is most women’s favorite thing in the bedroom or just during general foreplay, and is especially difficult to shy away from if she’s already gone down on you. While you might enjoy your blowjobs more than anything, you may feel obligated to keep her mouth off you so that you don’t have to reciprocate. Don’t feel that way anymore; you can have your cake and eat it too by following these simple tips on how to politely avoid going down on your woman.

Stuffy Nose

If you can’t breathe through your nose, then obviously you’ll suffocate going down on her. Let her know that you have a stuffy nose and she’s more likely to coddle you than get upset that you aren’t going down on her. As long as you don’t whip this excuse out every time you’re faced with eating her out, she’ll believe you every time. Don’t be too dramatic with it, but a few sniffs here and there can’t hurt you. She doesn’t want you to suffocate down there, and she definitely doesn’t want you getting snot all over her pussy.

Impatience

“Kiss and ask her if she wants you inside her”

“Kiss and ask her if she wants you inside her”

Oral sex during foreplay is great and often something a woman really looks forward to, but feigning impatience is a great way to bypass all that after getting what you want. When she wants you to go down, touch her and tell her that you just can’t wait to get inside her, and will probably die if you have to wait another second. She’ll be ecstatic that you’re so impatient to be inside her, and it’ll boost her confidence without having any idea that you really are just repulsed by the idea of eating her out. If she seems a little resistant to that and acts like she wants to insist on oral sex, just push her onto her back and start kissing her. The sheer desperation you act with will convince her that you genuinely can’t wait to have sex with her, and she’ll feel more like a goddess than a neglected girlfriend.

Cold Sores

Okay, this one is a last-ditch option that you really don’t want to resort to unless you absolutely have to. Cold sores aren’t the same kind of herpes as genital herpes, but they certainly aren’t anything she wants between her legs. Just tell her that you really can’t go down on her because you have a cold sore or feel one coming on. To be honest, she’ll be happy that you told her the “truth” instead of going down on her with a gross cold sore, and she won’t push the matter. You might not get kissed for the rest of the night, but keeping yourself from having to reciprocate is totally worth it. Besides, it gives you a great opportunity to try having her doggy-style or another position that doesn’t lend itself to kissing.

About the Author
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